" A single mother has a backbone made of steel and a heart of gold."
I am anxiously waiting for Neil to call me and inform me that he has landed safely in Seattle. I hate when Neil goes to China. It's been a good two years since he's had to go, so I'm out of practice. I'm really hating it this time around.
The worst thing about when Neil goes to China is that he is 15 hours ahead of me. So when something comes to mind at 11:00 in the morning that I just really need to discuss with him, I have to stop and do the math before I call him. Without fail, calling him that very second would mean waking him up at 2:00 a.m., which is disastrous for someone suffering from jet lag. But when he calls me upon waking up in the morning, it is 4:00 in the afternoon for me, which every mom knows is witching hour. I'm in the middle of getting kids to lessons and assessing the homework situation. No time to talk. Then when I finally get to call him before going to bed, I'm exhausted after failing at single-motherhood all day, and Neil is busy at the factory. Let's just say that communication while Neil is in China is spotty at best.
The other bad thing is that I'm a wreck while he is en route. From the time Neil leaves our front porch until he walks into his hotel in Xiaman, is 24 hours. 24 hours and four different flights. That's a lot of opportunity for catastrophe. The 13 hour flight to Beijing is the worst. No contact for 13 hours. For a fatalist like myself, that's a lot of time to conjure up every worst case scenario multiplied by ten. By the time he finally calls me, I've already planned his funeral and the next ten years of my widowhood. Fortunately, I'm sleeping through much of that long flight. Well, sleeping in theory. I make him promise to send me a text when he lands so that I can wake up and know that all is well.
One thing is for sure. If Neil ever did die on the way to China, the children would never get another home-cooked meal, nor would they graduate high school, due to a lack of homework completion, and the house would be a mess at all times. You see, this is what life looks like while Neil is out of town. I don't know what it is. It's not like he takes care of all of those things when he's here, between work and bishopric stuff. I suppose that it is his very presence in my life that motivates me to take care of this house and children that we have together. I suppose that a simple phone call or lunch date with him is enough to keep me going. I suppose that just having him in the house, living along side me, makes me want to cook dinner, and nurture our children, and do laundry. When he's here, I do more, and I do it better. He brings out the very best in me.
Which is why the poor kids got the dregs of me these last ten days. Bless their hearts. Jonah summed it up in a conversation with his dad last weekend, "Today has been the most boring, gloomy day ever." To my credit, I did come down with a humdinger virus this week. It was all I could do to pick up a pizza and transport the kids to and fro on a Nyquil-induced hangover. Usually I drown my sorrows in all sorts of costly entertainment, i.e. movies and shopping ventures, much to the kids' delight and Neil's chagrin. But I was no more than a lump on the couch this week.
All I can say is bless you dear single moms. How you do this day in and day out is beyond my comprehension. I salute you and offer you my greatest respect. You deserve all the pamperings that this life offers and all the blessings that the next life does!
The countdown begins until Daddy comes home.
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