"I Think God Knows Something We Don't"

"He not only knows what is best for you,  He also anxiously wants you to choose what is best for you." -Dieter Uchtdorf

Well here I am. I made it ten days on my thirty day blog challenge. Yesterday there was too much laundry to do, to many dishes to do, scriptures that needed reading, a cello book that needed purchasing and required two trips to the store to finally get, parent teacher conferences that took two hours thanks to three coach teachers that didn't show up until an hour before the conferences ended, kids who needed the computer for homework all night, and violin practicing and homonym homework that made it impossible to concentrate when I did try with all of my heart to sit down and blog really quick. 

In other words, life happened, making it impossible to document life. I am now going to resist my normal urge to throw my hands in the air, and say, "Why try!?" I am going to try not to let the perfect get in the way of the good, and I am just going to keep on plugging along. Sometimes motherhood is just darn discouraging. That is why I am up a half an hour before the children. So that I can have a moment of peace and quiet, to collect my thoughts before the morning chaos begins. Perhaps I am not in the fetal position crying because of last weekend's Women's Conference.

Over thirty years ago, Mom sat next to Grandma Fellows in a little chapel in Taylorsville waiting for the Relief Society General Meeting to begin. Her mother had passed away a few years before. But as she sat on the bench, she could feel the presence of her mother so strongly that without thinking she leaned over to talk to her. It was at this time that she decided that this meeting was important, and that if her mother had been allowed to tarry that she would have been at my mom's side. She committed at that time to try to always attend the General Relief Society Meeting.

She began to invite me to these special meetings as a teenager, even though I wasn't technically in Relief Society. I have such fond memories of sitting in the chapel with my mother, grandmother, and aunts, listening to the words of the prophet and Relief Society leaders. The physical feast afterwards at the nearest restaurant rivaled the spiritual feast.

Now Mom has daughters and granddaughters of her own, and the yearly General Relief Society Meeting has evolved into the Semi-annual General Women's Meeting, where all women eight years and older are invited. We don't miss the Women's Broadcast...ever. We all look forward to it. Jessica even came home from Logan to attend with us. Our physical feast began before at Roosters, then we all gathered at Mom's Stake Center for the spiritual feast, because we all know that Mom's stake offers the best refreshments afterwards...cakes from the Lion House. Heaven!

My favorite speaker was the favorite speaker of I'm sure about 550,000 other Mormon women. President Uchtdorf always seems to resonate with me. He and his wife must have an amazing relationship, because he seems to really understand women. Me and my girls exchanged high-fives as soon as we found out he was the concluding speaker. From my 15 year old to this tired 40 year old, we knew he would speak words of truth and comfort. I don't know if it's his charming German accent, or the poetic nature of his talks, or simply his absolute in-tuneness with the Spirit, but as he begins to speak the words travel across the world, into chapels and living rooms and laptops, penetrating the hearts of women of all ages and cultures, reminding each one of us that we're loved, and that we matter, and to just keep doing what we're doing.

The children will be up in two minutes. So I will leave you with some of his words. The words that I needed to hear last Saturday. The words that I need to hear this morning as the chaos begins:

"God loves you this very day and always. He is not waiting to love you until you have overcome your weaknesses and bad habits. He loves you today with a full understanding of your struggles...

"He sees you clearly. He knows you as you really are, and He loves you today and always."

"Do you think outward attractiveness, your dress size, or popularity make the slightest difference in your worth to the one who created the universe?"

"You are loved. You are dear to your heavenly parents."

Knowing that, I can pick myself up and keep plugging along:)

Thoughts on Naaman

Today was a good day despite the fact that I was functioning on little sleep. Ask me how I'm doing tomorrow. That will be the kicker. My primary lesson went well. It was all about Namaan, the leper who visited the prophet Elisha to be healed of his leprosy, then was offended when the prophet sent out a messenger to tell him to go wash himself in the river Jordan seven times. Today's application: Do we tend to discount or disregard the words of the prophet when the counsel he gives us is simple? Do we tell ourselves that if a prophet of God asked us to do something grandiose, we would certainly obey, all the while ignoring the simple counsel he is giving us today? Food for thought. But I need some sleep.

Ah, Women's Conference

Pay no heed to the ridiculous time at which I am posting this. I suppose that it is technically tomorrow. But I'm not going to get hung up on technicalities. I am just returning from a most delightful Girls' Night/Women's Conference with my cute mom, daughters, and sisters. This is one of the evenings I most look forward to each year. Let's just say that after seven hours of straight talking, we have hashed out most of the world's problems, our families problems, and our personal problems while giggling to the point that a change of pants was almost required. But I have no time to elaborate. Tomorrow... or should I say today I have to finish preparing  and somehow deliver a coherent primary lesson to half a dozen ten year olds. Not always easy on limited sleep, so I best be getting to bed! We'll chat more tomorrow.

Gaining Some Momentum

"Humility is an acknowledged recognition of our dependence on a higher power." -Ezra Taft Benson

It's been one of those mornings. Spencer needed to go to school early for a school book club meeting. They would be eating donuts and discussing good summer reads. In other words Spence needed me to take him to the land of his people. His land being the school library. His people being fellow bookies of his same age. So we dropped Sabrina off at the high school then began the arduous trek to the junior high. I say that because literally every road between our house and Spencer's school is under construction. Serenity now. I uttered it to myself all morning, especially as I chose the wrong construction saturated route and bottomed out my vehicle on the "Bump" the sign warned me of.

I got home only to realize that Spencer had left his lunch on the kitchen counter. That kid's brain sits comfortably between brilliance and absentmindedness at all times. He has a firm grasp on all things science, mathematics, and language. But when it comes to his physical world, the child is a train wreck. I love each of my kids' brains! Just love them! So I trekked back to the school. Upon returning, I received a text from said space-cadet informing me that he forgot his blue binder, could I please get it to him pronto. SERENITY NOW! One more drive through construction. By now I was a little bit famished and a little bit grumpy. I had thrown all hope of productivity out the window. It seems that the first hour of the day sets the tone for the rest of the day. The rest of this day already closely resembled me in a hamster wheel. 

I did not go home. I went straight to Kneaders. Was I wearing a stitch of makeup? Indeed I was not. Was I in presentable clothing? Hardly. Was I wearing a bra? YES! Ha, Kneaders it is. The great thing about Kneaders is that they have an entire bar that literally faces the wall, or should I say the windows. So for us introverts who show up in sweats and a low blood sugar stupor, we can simply turn our back to the world whilst consuming a carb rich meal of chunky cinnamon french toast and pouring over a ghoulish Halloween novel. It turned out to be a lovely morning.

So this marks eight days in a row of blogging. I don't think I've done anything besides eat and sleep eight days in a row. I can feel the momentum of this challenge beginning to work on me, so I will add another challenge to it while I'm still all motivated. 

Now for an essential habit. Prayer. Daily consistent prayer. It's a struggle. My prayers get real consistent and real heart-felt when I am hit with an unforeseen trial, or I'm facing a life-changing decision, or parenthood is testing me beyond my limits. But I am just plain lousy at the daily conversations with my Heavenly Father. And then I wonder why the heavens feel closed when it comes to personal revelation. I'm like that annoying friend who chews you out for never calling her but then never turns her cell phone on. 

A wise bishop once quoted this scripture:

Mosiah 21:14- "And they did humble themselves even in the depths of humility; and they did cry mightily to God; yea, even all the day long did they cry unto their God that he would deliver them out of their afflictions."

Then he reminded us that if we are having a struggle with prayer, our actual struggle may be with pride. Ouch! The absolute truthfulness of that statement hit a little too close to home. And continues to sting every time I come across that verse.

So here goes. 30 days in a row of daily prayer. Ready. Go.

It's Time To Retire

"When the Good Lord was creating mothers, He was into His sixth day of 'overtime' when the angel appeared and said. 'You're doing a lot of fiddling around on this one.'

"And God said, 'Have you read the specs on this order?' She has to be completely washable, but not plastic. Have 180 moveable parts...all replaceable. Run on black coffee and leftovers. Have a lap that disappears when she stands up. A kiss that can cure anything from a broken leg to a disappointed love affair. And six pairs of hands.' " 

-Erma Bombeck

I'm not gonna lie. I will not miss elementary school. I will not miss the make a 3D animal cell out of things just laying around your house projects. The only things laying around my house last night were a pair of smelly soccer socks, an empty pizza box, used string cheese wrappers, and a pile of junk mail. No matter how hard I racked my brain, I could not figure out how to turn these items into a 3D animal cell. So, as with all of these cutsie school craft projects, I was at Walmart at 9:30 at night in search of pipe cleaner, fuzzy balls, and googly eyes. Bless you Walmart. Bless you and your 24 hours of openness.

I will not miss the county floats. I look forward to throwing away shoe boxes with not a tinge of guilt, for fear that I may need it for an upcoming float.

I will not miss the dress a mountain man projects.

Or the make a word out of food projects.

Or the make a volcano out of food projects.

Or the science fair projects. Those blasted science fair projects!

I will not miss coming up with indian costumes and pioneer costumes for the Utah assembly. I will not miss the field trips or the class parties or the Valentine boxes.

I have been doing this elementary school thing for 13 years now. All of this stuff was cute and fun about ten years ago. When Jonah comes home with yet another "make a miracle out of items laying around your house" project, a few words come to mind, cute and fun are not on that list of words.

I had a good run. I should own stock in Hobby Lobby and Michaels. I've spent enough dollars and enough frenzied hours in those stores. But it's time. Time to turn in my craft glue and Cricut machine. Time to retire. If I can only endure the next nine months of...please donate a bag of chocolate chips for the class ice cream party, please create the Leaning Tower of Pisa out of sugar cubes, please send your son to school dressed like Socrates, please make a 3D amoeba out of things just laying around the house. If I can just endure to the end of Jonah's elementary years, then I can retire and breathe a worn-out sigh of relief.

Maybe this will all be cute and fun again when I'm a grandma. Then I will ease my grown children's burdens by inviting the grandkids over to make a float or a mobile or a 3D model of the New York Stock Exchange made out of things just laying around the house. Then the things laying around my house will be glitter and pipe cleaner and modeling clay and sugar cubes and buttons and beads of all varieties. Ah grandparenthood, every parent's hope for redemption!

Me and Mr. Hugo - We've Been Fighting

"Jean Valjean, my brother: you belong no longer to evil, but to good. It is your soul that I am buying for you. I withdraw it from dark thoughts and from the spirit of perdition, and I give it to God!" -Victor Hugo

I felt a little sheepish calling myself a reader, a reader who is partial to classic literature no less, and yet had never read Les Miserable by the great Victor Hugo. 

So I decided to tackle this book...four years ago I decided to tackle this book. Four years ago I started Les Miserable, and I am proud to say that as of five and a half hours ago I finished that book. All 1260 pages of that behemoth book are finally behind me.

It was lovely writing, and truly one of the most beautiful stories of redemption I've ever encountered. It was just the muchness of the writing that brought me to my knees. Anytime the actual story was being discussed I was pulled right in and couldn't put the book down. But the 120 page editorial on the battle of Waterloo just about did me in, as did the 30 page discussion on nunneries, and the 50 page detailed description of the sewers of Paris, and the 60 page accounting of all of the famous barricades of Paris. I am afraid that Mr. Hugo got shelved on more than one occasion and for months at a time. 

I must have joined Goodreads sometime ago, and obviously don't frequent the website, but every now and then I would get a reminder email that I started Les Miserables four years ago, and would I like to update my progress? I wanted to respond, "No Goodreads, I would not like to discuss my progress on that monstrous piece of literature. Now get off my back!"

Around page 1,000 I just wanted Javert to jump off that bridge and be done with it. And I had had enough of dear Marius' and sweet Cosette's forbidden love. Would they just tie the knot already?!! And would Cosette just grow a backbone and stand up to the men in her life, because I was growing weary of that simpleton. 

I sat down and devoured the last 75 pages today, and ended with all of the expected tender feelings. I wept for dear Jean Valjean, felt joy for the lovestruck couple, even pitied poor Javert. Victor Hugo is truly one of the greats. I'm a bit of a snob and tend to point the finger of scorn toward those literary pansies who search out the abridged versions of the great works. But I am officially stepping off my high-horse and recommending that everyone read Les Miserables. But unless you have the mental stamina to endure the reader's equivalent of an Iron Man race, then might I recommend reading the abridgment? There I said it. You win Mr. Hugo. Uncle I say. I bow to you and your literary genius. I am better for having read your masterpiece but daresay I shall never venture your direction again. Your book will sit upon my shelf as a sort of trophy. Proof of my mental fortitude and sheer determination. But I am now on to Frankenstein. At a mere 207 pages, I hope to finish it in record time. Happy Reading!

Neil's Shadow

"I have a little shadow that goes in and out with me,

And what can be the use of him is more than I can see.

He is very, very like me from the heels up to the head;

And I see him jump before me, when I jump into my bed." 

-Robert Louis Stevenson (A Child's Garden of Verses)

Jonah is an old soul. In fact, I think all of my children are old souls. Perhaps those are the only souls the Lord has left to send down to earth these days. The oldest, wisest, most valiant of his spirit children. But nonetheless, Jonah has an old soul.

From the time he was the tiniest little guy walking around with that fuzzy hair and adorable little double cowlick on the crown of his head forming a perfect mohawk, he has wanted to do whatever the adults were doing. He has never been content to play with toys. I don't know why I even bothered buying him toys. He was most content helping with whatever project I or his father were doing. 

Neil has a had a little shadow for these eleven years now. This shadow comes in the form of his youngest son. He looks just like Neil with his fuzzy hair and double cowlick, and walks just like Neil, and most importantly does whatever Neil is doing. Jonah loves his dad and loves his dad's projects. It's been that way from the beginning. If Neil was painting a room, he had better find a roller for Jonah.

If Neil was building a shelf, he had better find an extra hammer, because the three year old would be pounding in every other nail.

Neil had better not dream of turning the sprinkling system on at the beginning of the season without informing the two and a half year old.

Or have the audacity to repair a bike tire without help from the resident toddler expert.

There was the year that Neil replaced our kitchen floor. He had the painstaking process of scraping all of the linoleum off the subfloor, but don't worry he had help. Jonah was with him every night, every step up of the way. In fact, Jonah worked on the project while Neil was at work during the day. I would be downstairs doing laundry, only to hear an awful pounding coming from upstairs. I would run up to see what kind of mischief Jonah was in, only to find him intently chiseling away at that linoleum. Don't give the boy anything Fisher Price, hand him a for real wrench, or chisel, or screwdriver, and you won't hear a peep from him for hours.

The most broken Jonah's heart has ever been has been when he has walked into a room to find out that his dad has been working on a project without him. That is devastation personified right there. Which is why it was very convenient that Jonah was off track while Neil has been working on our yard. What a blessing to have no homework to keep Jonah from doing the thing he really loves, and that is working along side his dad.

Lunch with his mom...that was a fun day.

But helping his dad dig this hole in search of the water pipe?....he informed me that that was the best day.

You can't see Jonah in this photo. But if you had been looking out the window like I was when I took this photo, you would see little sprinkles of dirt coming up from the ground. The hole was now deeper than Jonah is tall, but he could be found in the depths of that hole ...digging and digging and digging some more. He came out as dirty as can be and grinning from ear to ear.

Saturday was dirt moving day. Also known as the best day of Jonah's life. 

I found him moping behind a pile of weeds because he was sure his father wouldn't let him help control the tractor. We remedied that situation.

Aside from a scary brush with death according to Jonah, when he accidentally pushed on the gas pedal as he was falling off the tractor, making it impossible for Neil to stop the thing, and leaving Jonah with a large tire burn on his arm, everything was great!

School is back in session for Jonah. This means that I will have to be the homework Nazi, insisting that the child finish his reading before he goes out to work with his dad. Something tells me that there will be nights that the reading doesn't happen, because who am I to keep this sweet shadow from the man he adores? Who am I to keep a boy and his dad from working together side by side?

Baby Bump, Bread, & Beautiful Sabbath Day Worship

"Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy and complaining about the shadow over my feet, I'd have cherished every minute of it and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was to be my only chance in life to assist God in a miracle." -Erma Bombeck

It's official. All of the children are now officially in school. I sit in peace and quiet as we speak. Can you hear me purring? I vowed that I would do no housework this week, that I would simply bask in the quiet that is my home and read or scrapbook. But this house is a disaster! I could not relax surrounded by such human devastation. So I suppose I'll do some cleaning today, but first...a little blogging.

Yesterday ended up being a fairly busy Sabbath day. We got up bright and early for the dedication of the Ogden Temple. I love living in a technological age. Back in the day, very few members of the church got to participate in a temple dedication because you can only fit so many people in the Celestial Room of any given temple. But thanks to satellites, thousands of members of the LDS church got to sit in chapels all over the valley and be a part of the dedication. It was a beautiful meeting. I had to hold back the tears at the end as we sang "The Spirit of God".

What a joy it was to have the whole family together. I look forward to the day when all of my children can join Neil and I in the temple. I had to snag a snapshot after the meeting. You take for granted having all of your children with you all of the time, and then one of your children moves out, and you wish you had cherished that time a little more. I'm certainly cherishing those moments now.

Once home from the dedication, Neil and I grabbed a bite to eat then drove up to Snowbasin to meet Alicia and Ryan. Nine years ago, around this very time of year, I took these engagement photos of my baby sister and her new fiancee.

Oh my goodness, they look like babies! I can't believe it has been nearly a decade. Yesterday, I took these pictures.

Oh, the steady passing of time. Alicia and Ryan have waited so long for this little one. I don't know why the Lord chooses at times to wait to bless us with the righteous desires of our hearts, but I am gaining more and more faith in God and His timing. There is no question that this is the right time for this little spirit to join Alicia and Ryan's family. We just can't wait to meet her!

We had to sneak this photo shoot in between rainstorms, but man it was worth the beautifully saturated colors! I'll share just a few more of my favorites. 

Cute Alicia showing off her beautiful baby bump.

These two will be amazing parents. 

Neil and I got home with just enough time for Neil to make some  Pulla to take over to Sunday dinner with the Watsons. Someday I will tell you the story of the day 21 years ago that Neil showed up on my porch with this heavenly Finnish sweet bread and secured himself the final two percent of my heart. Jonah  remained in his normal spot, perched right next to his father doing whatever his father is doing. Needless to say, this bread disappeared in a blink of an eye, and Jessica giggled with delight as Neil wrapped a loaf for her to take back to Logan. Whether she actually shared it with her roommates will be interesting to find out. I know I put on my greedy pants anytime Neil bakes a loaf of Pulla. 

A Sabbath day comprising of worship, family time, and feasting. Those really are the best kind of days.

An Itty Bitty Sunday Post

Ok, I think Sundays are going to be almost impossible for me to keep up on my blogging. Sundays will entail itty bitty posts. It's about maintaining the habit. 

Today consisted of three of my most favorite things: Family, Food, and Worship. More about that tomorrow. Good Night.

The Ogden Utah Temple - A Celebration

"And from this place they may bear exceedingly great and glorious tidings, in truth, unto the ends of the earth, that they may know that this is thy work, and that thou hast put forth thy hand, to fulfill that which thou hast spoken by the mouths of the prophets, concerning the last days." 

-Doctrine & Covenants 109:23

Day two of my little blogging challenge, and I already almost forgot  to get on the computer. I can see that weekends are going to require a concerted effort. 

My weekend posts may just have to be a little shorter. What a wonderful day! Jessica came home in the dark of night last night. How nice to have all of my children under the same roof again. There was something so very pleasant about having her walk up the stairs this morning and perch herself at the bar and to listen to her chatter about her college adventures. We enjoyed a delicious breakfast, the whole family together. I took a picture, but the kids probably wouldn't appreciate me posting it here in blog land. To me they are still as cute as when they were sleepy toddlers in footie pajamas, sporting tired faces, and bed head, but we'll leave the photo out for today.

Two months ago I sent these two teenagers against their will to their first Ogden Temple Cultural Celebration choir practice. They insisted that they did not want to waste their precious Sunday evenings at some dumb choir practice. Call me a bad mom, but I quickly removed their agency and informed them that this would be a once-in-a-lifetime experience that I refused to allow them to forfeit. In my heart I knew they would thank me later.

Although I have yet to receive my verbal thank you, I think they are grateful in their hearts to have had this experience. I must say that that is one gorgeous young lady and one strikingly handsome young man all dressed up for a celebration of the dedication of another one of the Lord's temples on earth.

Neil, and Jessica, and Jonah and myself sat in a chapel watching the celebration via satellite. You see this celebration was not about the church leaders or the parents. It was all about the youth. Pres. Eyring presided at the event. He stood up and gave a very brief welcome and let the rest of the evening be about the youth. There were virtually no parents allowed into the venue to watch the event because they wanted every seat in the Dee Event Center filled with participating teenagers. There were youth from as far north as Wyoming and far south as Riverton. They sang, and danced, and played instruments, and held posters. There was a way for every youth who wished to to participate, whether they felt they had talent or not. It was not about the talent. It was about the rising generation singing praises to their God in gratitude for a new temple. It was about tens of thousands of young people feeling the power of the Holy Ghost. It was about these noble souls getting a tiny glimpse of the great work they will do some day in rolling the work of the Lord forward.

These young people will be the ones filling this temple in days to come. They are already filling the temples. I have yet to take my kids to do baptisms for the dead without having to wait a long time, for the baptistry is always full. Always full.

God loves His children. He loves the youth of His church. He knows that the adversary is working hard on this generation. But God is at the helm. He will strengthen and fortify this generation. With every new temple dedicated, the power of Satan is diminished. And the power of God is magnified. I felt that power emanating from twenty miles away and through a satellite signal. I felt it in that tiny chapel, and I shed not a few tears and said a small prayer of gratitude that my two valiant spirits were one of the several thousand in that room singing praises to a loving Heavenly Father. I hope this is a treasured memory that they lock away and share with their own children someday. 

"Every foundation stone that is laid for a Temple, and every Temple completed according to the order the Lord has revealed for His holy Priesthood, lessens the power of Satan on the earth, and increases the power of God and Godliness, moves the heavens in mighty power in our behalf, invokes and calls down upon us the blessings of the Eternal Gods, and those who reside in their presence." 

-George Q. Cannon 1877 (Logan Temple Dedication)

Healthy Habits-It's Time!

"A small daily task, if it be really daily, will beat the labors of a spasmodic Hercules." -Anthony Trollope

I am an underachiever by nature. It's a truth about myself that I loathe to own up to, but after nearly 40 years, I am coming out of denial. I have a hard time sticking with anything. I am a virtuoso in the art of procrastinating, which I am sure is a contributing factor. I envy those bloggers out there who decide to do 100 days of fitness, or cook every dish in Julia Child's cookbook in a year's time, or blog every day for a year. It seems as soon as I set a goal for myself all motivation goes out the door and that habit or talent I wished to cultivate suddenly has lost its appeal. Suddenly exercise seems pointless, scripture study is a chore, cooking is drudgery. I think I can safely say that I am not a goal oriented person and that there are very few actual healthy habits in my life. Ok I guess I faithfully make my bed everyday without fail. Talk about shooting for greatness. I kind of really hate this about myself. 

Sabrina's violin teacher encourages her students to do a 100 days in a row practice chart. If the student is inspired by this achievement she can even go onto a 365 days in a row practice chart. The rule is at least 5 minutes of practice everyday, but the goal being a full practice session at least five days a week. Sabrina reached 100 days of practice in a row several years ago and vowed she would never do that again. Perhaps I am dealing with a "mini me" in the case of that precious child. Oh sweet daughter of mine, learn from your mother. Goals are good. Daily habits are good. Sporadic efforts and half-hearted attempts are a lacklustre way to go through life! I try to blame motherhood on all of this, but I've been mediocre since my youth. I seem to eek out of the day enough measly minutes to check Facebook and my favorite blogs with great loyalty. This habit hardly merits recognition. In fact, faithful social media following may fall under the category of a bad habit, an addiction even.

So here's the deal. I need good habits. I need some accomplishments. I need to go out of this life saying, "Well there was that one thing I was successful at. I did this one thing faithfully everyday, and I am a better person for it." It seems that if one creates one good habit, she is likely to create more. It's kind of a muscle that becomes stronger as we use it more. I'm wondering if I ever got that muscle. But I'm determined to find it if it does indeed reside in some back closet of my soul.

But it has got to be something I'm excited about. I know that I should focus on the essentials first, but I can not even begin to count how many times I've tried to create a habit centered around the essentials. Daily exercise, prayer, scripture study, monthly temple attendance. Such habits really are the end goal, but right now I need success. I'm not going to have success unless it's something that right from the get go I long to do on a daily basis, not something I know I should do regularly. I am experiencing a success famine, so I need to start with something that allows the heavens to open and drop buckets of progress onto this dried up life of mine. It's a good life. A happy life. But I am seeing very little progress. I am in a rut. A deep rut. One so deep that it's going to take a serious jolt to get me on some good ground again.

Every day for a year is completely out of the question. Such an aspiration would be self-destruction for an underachiever such as myself. Remember attainability is paramount here. 100 days in a row?...ummmm I don't know. That's also really pushing it. Perhaps 30 days in a row. Maybe I could muster some level of devotion to such a goal.

So here we go. I'm verbalizing it in writing on my little blog in hopes that I will somehow feel accountability to you nebulous, nameless list of readers. This is a big step for someone as noncommittal as myself. 

Thirty days in a row of writing in my little blog. That's it. I know you're shaking at the very grandiose nature of my aspiration. I told you, one must start small. Baby steps. But I do love to write, and I need more practice. Perhaps 30 days will turn into 100 days. Perhaps the trickle effect will make its way to prayer and exercise, but for now simply getting onto the computer each day and writing my thoughts is enough.

So here we are. One day in a row. I'm really good at one day in a row. This is familiar ground. But I will see you tomorrow. And that's when we'll be diggin' where the taters are! 

Life in Verbs

"This is not the time to be passive. This is the time to shape, sculpt, paint, participate...the time to get sweaty, to get dirty, to fall in love, to forgive, to forget, to hug, to kiss...this is the time to experience, participate and live your life as a verb." -Steve Maraboli

Enjoying not having to help Jonah with his homework in the evening but craving some solitude. It's been four months since I've enjoyed such a thing.

Grimacing at this return to July-like weather.

Wishing that dirt patch which our house sits on would just grow grass already and quit taking over my husband's life. I'm a slightly jealous wife.

Preparing for all sorts of auditions that my middle children are contemplating.

Worrying that Jessica is eating enough amidst the rigorous music major schedule that she is keeping. Hoping there are some nutritious snacks that make it into her mouth in between quartet and orchestra rehearsal.

Calendaring the kids' upcoming concerts. Can't wait. 

Planning for next year's vacation(s). Wanting to spend every dime on travel and zero dimes on yard installation, car repairs, or dental work.

Anticipating symphony season. Thrilled that we bought tickets while we could afford them. Well, we couldn't really afford them, but glad we threw caution to the wind before paying for tuition and a sprinkling system.

Looking forward to seeing Jessica this weekend. Her first trip back home since becoming an official Aggie.

Craving warm soup and rolls just don't want to heat up my kitchen to enjoy such a treat.

Scrapbooking Jessica's senior photos. Sigh.

Dusting the tops of my cabinets. Wait was it my idea to vault the ceilings in this house?

Immersing myself in the scriptures at least once a week. Some solitude may help in this matter.

Getting excited to fill my cup at the Ogden Temple Dedication this week and so excited for General Conference in two weeks. Needing the spiritual boost that only the brethren can provide.

Eating out way too much. Is this a surprise to anyone?

Working out far too little. Once again, tell me something new.

Wanting to read more.

Contemplating getting serious about Family Search.

Overwhelming myself on Family Search then abandoning the project only to get nudged by the Lord to give it another try.

Catching up on laundry. Ugh! It's futile.

Remembering Dad this time of year.

Loving some Girls Nights Out.

Decorating for Halloween.

Living. Loving. Working. Playing.